This is a tough one. Yet, so rewarding, and beautiful. When you share your heart and let yourself be vulnerable what you receive from life is love. Unspeakable. Awesome. Inspiring. Love. Yes it is scary. You may be rejected. You may not be understood by others. You may get unthinkable silence in return. You may. Most likely you won’t though. When you share from your heart there will be many others that receive your beauty and respond to you. One of my lovely and dear friends sent out this heart felt e-mail last week and it spoke so deeply to me. I felt it. I understood it. I didn’t want to stand silent to it, because I have felt this way many times in my life. I thought you might relate to it too and asked her if I could share it. This is what vulnerable and a sharing heart looks like. So beautiful, right?
Hey guys, I don’t know if you meet your struggles with this, but I just wanted to share something with you.
I don’t know if you ever feel pressure to be on a certain track or not, or whether to say certain things or not because of people’s possible reactions. Or if you ever change your words, or how you frame things/or yourself to seemingly ‘fit’ the other person. Sometimes the path I’ve chosen for myself feels murky because I’m doing something different. And sometimes I don’t want to share things about myself and my life with others because I fear/think i’ll be judged, criticized, or that people will be frustrated with me.Sometimes, I just don’t know how to react when people ask me what path I’m on. What school I’m going to? Am I going back in the fall?Sometimes, I can say something that is honest to myself. Sometimes I say something that is honest but I wince inside not sure about the reaction I receive.Other times, I throw something out there that is a long the lines of what I want, but not where I’m actually at.I even say things and try to hurry myself a long to be in a place in life that seems more acceptable by others.I feel the pressure of all this. And it can alter my course. Sometimes this fear hurts me, and sometimes it makes me angry, bitter, rebellious, or not pursue anything at all.I still have this fear.So I just wanted to get that off my chest.Even though you’re my friends, I still fear talking with you guys.Thanks for reading/listening.
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